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Banned Deviant
I am a Deviously Deviant
Napolean2323
Female/United States
Why I Am Here
No reason given yet
Last Visit: 53 weeks ago
Is a love slave to Birdy1564
Art Zone
Personal Zone
Misc. Zone
This is the place where you can personalize your profile!
But, how?
By moving, adding and personalizing widgets.
You can drag and drop to rearrange.
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The left side has widgets you can add!
Some widgets you can only access when you get a premium membership.
Some widgets have options that are only available when you get a premium membership.
We've split the page into zones!
Certain widgets can only be added to certain zones.
"Why," you ask? Because we want profile pages to have freedom of customization, but also to have some consistency. This way, when anyone visits a deviant, they know they can always find the art in the top left, and personal info in the top right.
Don't forget, restraints can bring out the creativity in you!
Now go forth and astound us all with your devious profiles!
This is a list of random jokes I decided to send to everyone on my friends list:
1) A Plumber joke: Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. 2) A Harvard joke: I was taking a tour of Harvard with one of the guides, and I asked him at the end of the tour, "But where's the library at?" He chuckled and said, "I can tell you're not a Harvard man." I said, Huh? and he replied condescendingly, You see, here at Harvard, we never end a sentence with a preposition. So I replied, Oh, well in that case, where is the library at, JERK? 3) A WTF?! joke: A man wanted to figure out what kind of lifestyle his son was going to follow. So before his son got home, the man set out a beer, a wad of cash, a Playboy magazine, and a bible. The man thought: If he takes the beer, hes going to become a drunk. If he takes the cash, hes going to become a businessman. If he takes the Playboy magazine, hes going to become a pimp. And if he takes the bible, hes going to become a Priest. The man then hid in the closet when his son got home. He watched his son through a crack in the door. His son saw the items on the table and ran over to them. He took the wad of cash and stuffed it in his pocket. Then he took the bible and held it under his arm. Then he took the beer and popped the top off. Finally, he took the Playboy magazine and opened it as he headed to his room. His father whispered in horror, Oh my godHes gonna become a POLITICIAN!!! (If anyone doesnt get that joke, I understand. Its kinda complicated.) 4) A hospital joke: 4 men were in the waiting room of a hospital when a nurse came in. She went to the first man and said, Congratulations, sir, youre the father of twins. The man said, Thats oddI work for the Minnesota Twins! The nurse said to the second man, Congratulations, sir, youre the father of triplets. The man said, StrangeI work for the 3M Company! The nurse said to the fourth man, Congratulations, sir, youre the father of quadruplets! The man said, What a coincidenceI work for a Four Points Sheraton hotel! The fourth man was groaning in despair, and bumping his head against the wall. One of the other men said, Whats the matter? The fourth man whined, I work for 7-UP!! 5) A dumb blonde joke (If anyone who reads this is blonde, I am not implying any insult whatsoever to blonde people): Three womena redheaded girl, a brunette, and a blonde were arrested for attempted murder. They were sentenced to death by execution squad. They were marched out to the execution ground and forced up against the wall. As the executioners raised their guns, the redheaded girl shouted, TORNADO!! The executioners threw themselves to the ground, and the redheaded girl climbed over the wall and escaped. The executioners got up and prepared to fire. Then, the brunette shouted, EARTHQUAKE!! The executioners threw themselves to the ground again, and the brunette climbed over the wall and escaped. The executioners got up a second time and prepared to fire. Then, the blonde screamed, FIRE!! and the executioners granted her request. 6) Some jokes for lexophiles (Big word lovers): 6A) Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and Ill show you A-flat miner. 6B) I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. 6C) Dead batteries were given out by the store free of charge. 6D) A grenade was thrown into a kitchen in France. It resulted in Linoleum Blownapart. (That was a bad one. Sorry.) 6E) Writing with a broken pencil is completely POINTless.
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I am a Burning Core of Sonic Obsession
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"If they bury my ass up, be sure to park my bike." --Robin Williams (as Patch in the movie "Patch Adams" )
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i like deku link, sonamy, taieam, kingdom hearts, and kirby.
1) A Plumber joke: Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
2) A Harvard joke: I was taking a tour of Harvard with one of the guides, and I asked him at the end of the tour, "But where's the library at?" He chuckled and said, "I can tell you're not a Harvard man." I said, Huh? and he replied condescendingly, You see, here at Harvard, we never end a sentence with a preposition. So I replied, Oh, well in that case, where is the library at, JERK?
3) A WTF?! joke: A man wanted to figure out what kind of lifestyle his son was going to follow. So before his son got home, the man set out a beer, a wad of cash, a Playboy magazine, and a bible. The man thought: If he takes the beer, hes going to become a drunk. If he takes the cash, hes going to become a businessman. If he takes the Playboy magazine, hes going to become a pimp. And if he takes the bible, hes going to become a Priest. The man then hid in the closet when his son got home. He watched his son through a crack in the door. His son saw the items on the table and ran over to them. He took the wad of cash and stuffed it in his pocket. Then he took the bible and held it under his arm. Then he took the beer and popped the top off. Finally, he took the Playboy magazine and opened it as he headed to his room. His father whispered in horror, Oh my godHes gonna become a POLITICIAN!!! (If anyone doesnt get that joke, I understand. Its kinda complicated.)
4) A hospital joke: 4 men were in the waiting room of a hospital when a nurse came in. She went to the first man and said, Congratulations, sir, youre the father of twins. The man said, Thats oddI work for the Minnesota Twins! The nurse said to the second man, Congratulations, sir, youre the father of triplets. The man said, StrangeI work for the 3M Company! The nurse said to the fourth man, Congratulations, sir, youre the father of quadruplets! The man said, What a coincidenceI work for a Four Points Sheraton hotel! The fourth man was groaning in despair, and bumping his head against the wall. One of the other men said, Whats the matter? The fourth man whined, I work for 7-UP!!
5) A dumb blonde joke (If anyone who reads this is blonde, I am not implying any insult whatsoever to blonde people): Three womena redheaded girl, a brunette, and a blonde were arrested for attempted murder. They were sentenced to death by execution squad. They were marched out to the execution ground and forced up against the wall. As the executioners raised their guns, the redheaded girl shouted, TORNADO!! The executioners threw themselves to the ground, and the redheaded girl climbed over the wall and escaped. The executioners got up and prepared to fire. Then, the brunette shouted, EARTHQUAKE!! The executioners threw themselves to the ground again, and the brunette climbed over the wall and escaped. The executioners got up a second time and prepared to fire. Then, the blonde screamed, FIRE!! and the executioners granted her request.
6) Some jokes for lexophiles (Big word lovers):
6A) Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and Ill show you A-flat miner.
6B) I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
6C) Dead batteries were given out by the store free of charge.
6D) A grenade was thrown into a kitchen in France. It resulted in Linoleum Blownapart. (That was a bad one. Sorry.)
6E) Writing with a broken pencil is completely POINTless.
--
I am a Burning Core of Sonic Obsession
-----
"If they bury my ass up, be sure to park my bike." --Robin Williams (as Patch in the movie "Patch Adams" )
--
i like deku link, sonamy, taieam, kingdom hearts, and kirby.
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i like deku link, sonamy, taieam, kingdom hearts, and kirby.
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i like deku link, sonamy, taieam, kingdom hearts, and kirby.
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i like deku link, sonamy, taieam, kingdom hearts, and kirby.
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